Hi there!

I’m Boromir. I saw you at the Council, remember? I wanted to go to Gondor, silly me. But hey, that’s over now — we’re going to Mordor to get rid of that… what was it?

Oh, that Ring. Silly me, I’d completely forgotten!

You know, I’ve worn a lot of jewelry in my day. Mithril, gold, silver — you name it. Heck, I’m wearing a leaf-brooch right now! How silly. So I totally get you wearing a ring, Frodo. No big deal, not at all. I think you’re really brave and all just for carrying it around. I know I sure don’t want that burden. No, sir. I’m content to come along for the ride and be part of the fellowship. Say, you like this flask I’ve got on my belt? Keep it — I’ve got plenty. Always willing to help out a friend.

Wow, we’re sure going on a long journey. You must be getting tired, carrying that heavy pack without any shoes. You’ve got hairy feet, though, heh heh! Hey, anytime I can help you out, maybe carry some of your stuff, you just let me know. Not that Ring though — no sir. That’s yours, man. You be sure to keep that Ring (is that pure gold?) to yourself, no sense in passing it around or anything.

Nope, in my mind there would be nothing worse than having a ring around your neck all day. What a drag! I would hate it, even though it’s a pretty Ring — REALLY pretty. No siree bob! Nuh-uh. Hey, did you notice how it makes a tinkle-tinkle sound as you walk? Kinda pretty, really. They say it’s the One Ring of Power. Sounds dangerous! I sure wouldn’t want it just sitting there dangling. Nope, I think it would be more smart to keep a weapon like that somewhere safe, like with the military or something. What am I saying? Silly Boromir, there I go on again, talking about myself. Did I mention that I’m Captain of Gondor? Yeah, it’s true, I’m in charge of all the military operations. No big deal though. I don’t want the Ring! It’s just fine there, around your little neck. Yep, let’s keep it there.

Oh, there’s the sound of that Ring again! It’s really nice. Heaven knows what I’d do if I had it. Probably use it to save my people or something — but that’s just me. I’m totally okay with the whole “let’s go on a suicide mission to destroy the enemy’s most powerful weapon rather than use it ourselves” plan. Hey look - it came out from under your shirt again. Weird how it reflects light, even when when it’s cloudy outside. Man, that is some Ring. Phew — hold on to that one! It’s nice, but I sure don’t want it — or need it!

Say, Frodo, could I take a look at that Ring again? It’s been awhile since I saw it, just want to see if it’s gotten dinged up or anything. Hey, don’t look at me like that! Just curious. Wow, it still looks as good as ever. Mind if I touch it? Come on, it’s YOUR ring, I just wanna touch it. Come on. Hey, Frodo. We’re pals, remember? I don’t want that Ring! Besides, it’s not like the Ring rightly belongs to me. I mean, yes, it should go to Gondor, and I’m the military commander of Gondor and everything, but still. So just let me touch it. Please? I’ve been nice to you — I gave you that flask, remember? Now let me see that Ring.

Have you ever noticed how small Hobbits are, Frodo? How thin and fragile your necks are? How I could take your head in one gloved hand, and crush it? Strange, isn’t it. That Ring… GIVE ME THAT RING! IT IS MINE!! I WANT IT!! NOW!!! THE RING!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Whoa! Where did that come from! Sorry, Frodo! Frodo? FRODO!?